McCain Campaign Down the Toilet – Joe the Plumber Trying to Fix It

John McCain’s campaign is running like a broken toilet, and his campaign surrogate “Joe the Plumber” seems to be proving to America why he doesn’t have his license.

This “expert” on everything American appeared on Neil Cavuto’s show on FoxNews Sunday in an attempt to cast doubts on Obama’s loyalty to the US.

Confidential to Joe the Plumber:  We’re sick of you.  Yes, we thought it was cute when McCain mentioned your name at least 25 times during the third debate.  We even liked The Daily Show’s take on you the next night.  Weeks later though, we just have to say that it’s old.

Here’s a reality check:  You’re an unlicensed plumber from Ohio with nothing of any profundity to add to the political table.  You speak in gross generalizations and when somebody pins you down, you try explaining away that it’s only your opinion.  If you could at least give us some cold, hard facts regarding your opinions and make a case for your allegations, we might actually take you semi-seriously.

Anyway, here is the expert himself on why Barack Obama doesn’t seem loyal to the US:

Shepard Smith at FoxNews of all places, tried to pin down this “plumber’s helper” as to why a vote for Obama is a vote for the death of Israel.  From “The New York Times:

For five painful live-on-Fox minutes the next day, Mr. Smith repeatedly asked Mr. Wurzelbacher what evidence he had to back up that charge. Mr. Wurzelbacher refused to answer. He said it was up to Mr. Smith’s viewers to figure out why he, Joe the Plumber, thought Mr. Obama was a menace to Israel.

A visibly shaken Shepard Smith had to offer a disclaimer to Fox viewers:

“I just want to make this 100 percent perfectly clear. Barack Obama has said repeatedly and demonstrated repeatedly that Israel will always be a friend of the United States no matter what happens once he becomes president of the United States. His words.”

He ended his disclaimer with, “man, it just gets frightening sometimes.”  Amen Shep.

Don’t get me wrong Joe the Plumber.  I’m sure that you’re a whiz with PVC pipe.  I just don’t need your political analysis for the same reason that I don’t need a cable news political pundit fixing my septic tank.  Let’s face it.  James the Political Blogger doesn’t appreciate blowhards who don’t know what they’re talking about elbowing their way into his turf.  Thankfully, I’ll have to put up with you for two more days before you go back to Ohio to live in obscurity.

In the 1999 book “Our Dumb Century” by The Onion, life as the saying goes, imitated art.  The following satirical headline appeared in the book almost a full decade before the 2008 election:

Thanks to John McCain’s sound judgment, we as a nation are living this satirical headline.  Mission accomplished.

Could someone please explain to me why McCain and the mainstream media decided to validate this nutjob’s take on politics?  Poor McCain.  Looks like Joe is trying to fix McCain’s broken campaign, but is breaking it even more.

Wurzelbacher Doppelganger? or Who Is The Real “Joe the Plumber?”

Could this man be related to Charles Keating?

John McCain may want to start vetting some of these people he’s supporting.  If the following allegations are true, McCain may have even more to answer for.

As indicated in my last blog, the star of last night’s debate was Joe Wurzelbacher or “Joe the plumber” as McCain and Obama both called him.  This folksy moniker was mentioned around 25 times by both McCain and Obama.

My impression last night was that Joe Wurzelbacher was one of those independent voters who was teetering on the $250,000 mark, while McCain and Obama were debating on whether this man’s taxes would go up, down, or stay the same.

I’m impressed that McCain would bring up this random person from Ohio at last night’s debate.  Just how random was McCain and Obama’s reference to Joe the plumber?

From the New York Times:

CREDIT MARKETS; Keating Aide in Guilty Plea

Published: December 10, 1991

The highest associate of Charles H. Keating Jr. to turn state’s evidence against the former owner of the Lincoln Savings and Loan Association pleaded guilty today to bank fraud and agreed to cooperate with Federal investigators.

Bruce Fairchild Dickson, 38 years old, a former Lincoln president and senior vice president of Lincoln’s parent company, the American Continental Corporation, entered the plea before Federal District Judge Manuel Real.

The single bank fraud count carries a maximum five-year prison sentence and $250,000 fine. The judge agreed to delay sentencing until June 1 after Michael Lightfoot, a defense lawyer, and David Sklansky, an assistant United States attorney, said Mr. Dickson was cooperating with prosecutors.

Mr. Lightfoot would not discuss the case with reporters.

Mr. Dickson was the fifth former associate to agree to testify against Mr. Keating. Mr. Dickson was convicted last week in a California court on 17 of 18 counts of securities fraud and faces up to 10 years in prison and a $250,000 fine.

Mr. Dickson was a close aide to Mr. Keating and worked with Mr. Keating’s son-in-law, Robert Wurzelbacher, a senior vice president of American Continental.

There is a flurry of blogs and articles floating around right now alleging that Joe Wurzelbacher may be a close relative to Robert Wurzelbacher.  According to various articles buzzing right now, McCain campaign strategist and advisor Steve Schmidt allegedly tried to warn McCain before the debate:

If Steve Schmidt had any hair left, I hear he would have been pulling it out tonight. He reportedly screamed at John’s debate prep team tonight (out of earshot of reporters, of course). “You idiots – he’s related to Charles Keating… of the Keating Five scandal!”

After seeing footage of Joe Wurzelbacher, I could pretty much sum up that this guy is not an undecided voter.  There is no problem with that in and of itself, but the impression that I got last night from the candidates was that of an undecided voter named “Joe the plumber” who was scrutinizing the two candidates’ tax plans.  Again, that’s not Joe’s fault.  It was the impression that McCain gave of this guy from Ohio.

The burning question now is, “Is he, or isn’t he?”  Is he related to the Keatings, or could it be a “Wurzelbacher doppelganger?”  Could this Joe be related to Charles Keating’s son-in-law, or is it a different Joe?  If he was a plant by the McCain camp, there could be repercussions.

I have a feeling that the media will dig into this, and see if this “average-Joe” is at all as average as McCain claims.  If he is indeed a Keating relative, I think both McCain and “Joe the plumber” will have some explaining to do.  Since there is so much conflict in the blogosphere  on this man’s relations, I will update as this story unfolds.

Now doggone it, say it ain’t so Joe.

Update:  Keith Olberman on “Countdown” set the record straight and confirmed that “Joe the plumber” Wurzelbacher is not a relation to Robert Wurzelbacher, son-in-law to Charles Keating.  BJD, you can rest easy now.

I couldn’t help doing this one.  How many times can you use “Wurzelbacher Doppelganger” in a title?

God, I love a good hoax!